Hi! My name is Deirdre and I have been doing some intense, hard work on myself for the last ten years...and it’s not over.
Not by a long shot.
But I love being a BadAss so I persevere! For most of my life I’ve suffered from a severe lack of self-responsibility.
I realized if I was going to be part of the solution to the global craziness we are experiencing right now, I had to start living a Radically Self-Responsible life. We don’t have time to fuck around anymore. We have to do our work and raise the level of consciousness on this planet if we are going to survive. Whew, that was heavy, wasn’t it?
I have always despised people who played the victim. They seemed weak and pathetic to me. Then, to my horror, I realized I had been playing the victim my entire life. I was the thing I despised. That messed with my head just a bit.
Being a victim makes it really easy to blame everyone and everything but yourself for how much your life sucks.
On the surface my life looked okay. I was surrounded by people who loved me, I had a career and I had enough clean underwear to get through an entire week. I had everything I thought I wanted.
And yet I was vaguely unhappy. I say vaguely because I didn’t know what was wrong BUT I could tell you who’s fault it was… my husband’s or my mom’s or my childhood or the land lord who wouldn’t rent to me when I was 22 or the fact that I didn’t have my own car until I was 28.
I was SUCH a victim.
Somehow, I found a path through the fog of victimhood and lack of self-responsibility. Finding that path was a crap shoot, I marvel at how I made it to where I am today considering I had a big problem with asking for help or support or hearing the truth.
Find a path I did. This path has had starts and stops and right turns and left turns but it was and is a path, which led to another path and another path and on and on. A truly magical moment came when the path led to this idea of Radical Self-Responsibility ( I didn’t know it was magical at the time). Radical Self-Responsibility was a way out of victimhood for me.
I am not perfect. Sometimes I get it right and sometimes I get it spectacularly wrong. I don’t have it all figured out and I don’t expect you to either.
Radical Self-Responsibility is not about perfection. It’s about getting to your vulnerable truth.
That is what being a BadAss is all about… getting to your vulnerable truth and it is usually pretty messy.
I had to deconstruct my idea of spiritual perfection to find my inner BadAss and get to my REAL life. Most of the time my REAL life doesn’t look anything like an InstaGram post. I rarely, if ever, find myself sitting peacefully on a beach, meditating as unicorns farting rainbows cavort around me. My life is blurry, rumpled and comfortable. I am happy, I am sad , I am joyful and I am despondent, sometimes all in the span of 5 minutes, it’s how I roll. I try to feel all those feelings. I try to let them process through me. I cry when the feeling to cry comes on. I sit and seethe in my anger until it passes. I soak in joy when it washes over me. I try not to run away from anything these days…. unless its a mountain lion. I stumble and fall but I get up a lot faster than I used to. I keep on working to be the most authentic version of me possible and it is totally worth it.
If you're ready to join me on this journey of radical self responsibility and general bad-assery, learn more about how you can become a BadAss.