Managed MomentsMusings on health, mindfulness, wellness, and bad-assery by Deirdre.
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As I was riding up the hill my thoughts turned sour. “I am so out of shape.” “I suck.” “This ride sucks.” “Why did I think this was a good idea?” Five minutes earlier I had been thoroughly enjoying myself. What changed? I was starting to get tired, that’s what changed. This is a common pattern for me. I am doing something, like riding my bike, thoroughly enjoying myself and then one small, minute thing happens or changes and the whole day is shitty…. in my mind. I have been getting good at catching these moments, sometimes right away, sometimes after a few minutes. On this ride they went on for a few minutes before I realized what I was doing. I was having a pretty spectacular pity party, that’s what I was doing.
The key to this mind management moment is that I caught myself in time to turn it around. That has taken a lot of practice and I’m super stoked that it is starting to pay off.
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I love my mom. My mom has dementia. Talking to her on the phone is an exercise in patience as she tells me the same things two or three times in one conversation. She called me today. My dad was out and she was lonely. I admit there are many times I don’t answer when she calls. I have no good reason for not answering, I just don’t want to deal with her sometimes. Today I answered. I talked to her for for 40 minutes and I managed my mind like a BadAss through the whole conversation. People with dementia repeat themselves a lot. They don’t realize they are repeating themselves and they do not do it to be irritating, it is just part of having dementia. During other calls I have been impatient with her. During other calls I have let her know, usually with very little compassion, when she is repeating herself. All this does is upset her because she honestly doesn’t remember saying it and now she knows she did and it freaks her out that she can’t remember having said it before. Calling her out serves no purpose other than for me to vent my frustration.
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AuthorWrite something about yourself. No need to be fancy, just an overview. Archives
September 2018
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